Sometimes I pause and ask myself a question I can’t seem to shake: Are we truly living our lives? or are we just surviving them?

As moms, partners, professionals, caretakers (often all of the above) we are told to do it all. The message is clear: work harder, push through, show up no matter what. And while this hustle mentality may help us climb a career ladder or keep things afloat at home, it often comes at a cost that’s too high to ignore: our well-being.

We go to work sick because we can’t afford to call out. We miss vacations because there’s no more PTO left. We put off rest, joy, and self-care, always promising ourselves a future time when we’ll finally catch our breath, but that time rarely comes.

What does it mean to "make it" if we’re too exhausted to enjoy what we’ve worked so hard for? What good is reaching the top if our mental health has already hit rock bottom?

This constant pressure to hustle and produce has become a cultural norm. And for many of us.. especially moms it feels like the only option. But I’m here to say: It shouldn’t be.

We deserve better. Our children deserve to see what a balanced, joyful life looks like. Not one where we’re constantly burned out, mentally drained, and physically stretched thin. They deserve to see that rest isn’t a reward it’s a necessity. That happiness isn’t something you postpone until retirement or that once-a-year trip.  it’s something we’re allowed to claim every day, in small ways.

I don’t have all the answers. But maybe it starts with saying no more often. With honoring our limits. With unlearning the idea that we have to earn our worth through exhaustion. Maybe it starts by taking that sick day without guilt. By planning that weekend trip even if it means saying “not this time” to something else.

Maybe it starts by choosing to live and not just survive.

we deserve a life we don’t feel the need to escape from.